• Sharon Evans


Updated: Jul 1, 2020

We all love our phones. They keep us in touch with everyone we love. And some we don’t love too, but mostly loved ones. Sit for a minute and think about how intrusive your phone actually is. If you watch carefully, you will see that people are constantly reaching for their phones to check for messages or send one. There’s just no getting away from it. And heaven help you if someone calls you and you don’t answer. Then the questions stream forth… ‘why do you even have a phone?’ ‘you never answer your phone, I don’t know why you bother having one’ ‘what if I needed you urgently?’

We allow people to intrude on our every thought and deed. The silence of not having your phone with you for an hour or two when you take the kids to the beach, or the dogs for a walk, or just have some time to yourself is so liberating. Somehow generations of people managed to survive life with a phone that had to be plugged into the wall at home or at the office. They were unreachable once they left those places. Yet here we are, filling the earth to bursting point with our survival. It might be time to take a look at the necessity of having a phone on your person twenty four hours a day.

Do we need a phone in bed? Even if you are in bed alone, do you actually need to invite everyone into bed with you? Isn’t that your quiet time? Isn’t it the time when you reflect on the day’s events, sort them out in your mind and put them to bed (literally)? You need some time away from a screen to get your body into sleep mode. So many of us complain about not sleeping much anymore. It’s most likely got something to do with screen time. All you need is an hour away from television, computers, tablets and phones and you will find restful things to do that will prepare your mind for sleeping.

Photo on 18-04-2019 at 13.40

Now…. my huge issue. Driving with a phone to your ear. What message are you broadcasting to those people in your car and those around you? Firstly, I have seen people on their phone, who then put the phone in their lap to show a reckless taxi driver some choice sign language. Here’s the deal honey… you are just as reckless as that taxi driver. You are in the same category as he is. Don’t think that you are a better driver. You are endangering the lives of innocent people. You are being an example to new drivers. Is that the example you should be setting? If you think it is, then you do not have the right to say anything when someone else screws up on the road. Your voice no longer means anything. If, heaven forbid, you have children in your car then here’s the thing… they are sitting there listening to your conversation. They don’t really always hear the content of the conversation, but what they are learning is that their little lives don’t mean much to you. You are endangering them so that you can satisfy your need for social media acknowledgement by answering that call. Eventually they will hear of a car that was involved in an accident and of someone who died in that accident and when they find out it was a phone user who caused that accident, they will put two and two together and see your poor judgement for what it is. Today’s children are not the same as we were at their age. They are media savvy and they are wise beyond their years. They will figure it out. Now try and teach them anything… you will be the parent who doesn’t care about them, yet you are insisting that they do something they don’t really feel like doing. Instead of instilling a sense of belonging and wellbeing in your children, you have instilled a sense of fear and isolation. You have taught them that unless you get caught committing a crime (which you could likely bribe your way out of anyway – in front of your kids) you may go ahead and do it. You may as well be drunk behind the wheel too. Do you think they won’t notice? Children notice EVERYTHING you do. Just say something you shouldn’t and you’ll find that out. When your child does wrong, who are you to tell them off? Do you really think they will take anything you say seriously after what you’ve taught them by your own actions? Tell them you love them and you’ll see the doubt in their eyes. Actions speak louder than words.

I see mothers every day driving along with the phone tucked next to their ear and the children sitting in the back seat and I wonder to myself whether she deserves those children.  How vitally important can that call be that she needs to drive and take it? You can hear from the way children talk which ones come from homes where they aren’t taught manners, consideration and respect for others. I think the use of a phone in the car falls under all those categories, but then that’s just my opinion. Suffer the little children…

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